Change Your Life: Focus on What You Want, Not What You Think You Deserve
Since I first met Steve Sissler he has been dropping gold faster than I could jot it down, and I am often in awe of his take on life. Steve will give it to you straight, and he makes no excuses for the truth. He doesn’t appear to have an angle, or an agenda, but he’s also not gonna sugar-coat it. I was excited to interview Steve on our podcast because I knew he’d drop some eye-opening insights for our listeners, and he did not disappoint.
I’ve read several of Steve’s books and had at least a dozen consulting sessions with him but if I had to pick one concept I got from Steve that has had the greatest impact on my life, it is his teaching on shifting from the “deserve” mindset to a “desire” mindset.
Steve touches on this in this week’s podcast and I believe your entire life can shift the instant you take on the desire mindset, and let go of what you “deserve.”
The concept of shifting from a “deserve” mindset to a “desire” mindset is transformative because it changes the focus from external validation to internal motivation. In a “deserve” mindset, we rely on external judgments and fairness, which can lead to feelings of entitlement and resentment when expectations aren’t met. This often places the responsibility for our happiness on others, leaving us powerless.
On the other hand, the “desire” mindset encourages us to take personal responsibility for our goals and aspirations. It prompts us to define what we truly want and actively pursue it, rather than waiting for others to give us what we think we deserve. This approach empowers us to create solutions and take actionable steps toward achieving our desires. It shifts the energy from being stuck in blame or feelings of injustice to a proactive stance focused on what can be done now to fulfill our desires.
This perspective can be especially impactful when facing challenges or advocating for change, as it emphasizes a vision-driven approach rather than a reactive one. It opens up possibilities beyond what we might feel entitled to and encourages us to dream bigger and act on our desires with a sense of purpose and agency.
Imagine the freedom your future has when it is tethered to nothing other than your desire to expand and pursue your calling without blame or justification.
I encourage you to throw the word deserve out of your vocabulary and replace it with desire. What you deserve doesn’t really matter, as it’s an arbitrary measurement of good/bad, right/wrong, that is more wrapped up in the past than having anything to do with where you’re going. You only shackle yourself to the limitations of others, or your own when you confine yourself to what is deserved. When you live in the energy of your desire, you are free!
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/chasing-self-actualization/id1749598394?i=1000657891640